In the world of International Adoption, Guatemala is one of the most popular and least regulated Countries. Last year there were estimated to have been 1,500 Guatemalan Children and Babies who have started fresh lives abroad, but the spectre of Illegal Adoptions have haunted Guatemala for years. Stories have emerged of mothers being forced to give up their new born children and of a booming private adoption business that has now grown almost into a multi million pound industry.

One of the key questions to look into is, are illegal adoptions taking place and if so how widespread is the practice? Finally, what is in the best interests of the Children of Guatemala?

“With Overseas adoption, what is in the best interests of the children of Guatemala?”

Whilst organisations, such as UNICEF, do not claim that all of the overseas adoptions coming out of Guatemala are illegal or abusive, a new report issued from the organisation does highlight the increasing problem of child trafficking.

“Overseas adoption arose directly out of Guatemala’s harrowing history.”

Overseas Adoptions and International adoption arose directly out of Guatemala’s harrowing history. The 36 year civil war which ended officially only four years ago left nearly a quarter of a million dead or disappeared and one million homeless, half of them children.

Elizabeth Gibbons is the director of UNICEF, and a leading critic of adoption as practised in Guatemala:

‘Many, many orphaned children were taken into adoption by military officers sent into international adoption. Originally a humanitarian activity, but it became obvious that it had the potential for being a lucrative business. And the higher demand in the West the more birth control, more access to abortion so you have the problem of a huge demand, therefore a supply must be created.’

In recent years there has been a tightening up of controls in many of the major embassies and the UK, US and Canadian embassies now carry out DNA tests of both the birth mother and the baby to check out that the woman giving the baby up for adoption is the real birth mother.

‘The existence of DNA doesn’t in any way tell you whether the mother is willingly giving up the child or whether she is being coerced. The second concern is that the children who pass the DNA test are not the same ones who go with the adopting parents on the plane, they could be switched. And thirdly, that the child who is rejected for having a negative DNA result by one of three embassies that offer this test, can then be offered to another embassy with parents of a another nationality.’

‘No one respects the law or the state; everybody just does their own thing. And it’s the same with adoptions’

So with all of this abuse of the system going on, why hasn’t the government of Guatemala done anything to stop it. The general consensus is that Guatemala is in chaos with the country, now a fledgling democracy, only just emerging from under the shadows of years of Military rule

Guatemala is a difficult place from which to operate from and it is very hard to know who is in charge of what. There doesn’t appear to be a Minister in charge of Social Affairs and Adoption is very much bottom rung on the ladder.

The Chair of the Commission on the Child and the Family in the Guatemalan Parliament is Nineth Montenegro who is a vigorous critic of her own system and is campaigning to pass the “The Children’s Code” to protect the rights of the Child in Guatemala explains:

‘We’ve been working on it for three years now and parliament still hasn’t passed it. They say, if we try to regulate adoption in this way we will deny children better opportunities in wealthier countries. There has been terrible resistance to the new law. You know Guatemala is a democracy only in name, not a real democracy.

No one respects the law or the state; everybody just does their own thing. And it’s the same with adoptions.’

Part Two of this article will deal with the fun and games (euphemism for hassle) of dealing with Lawyers and Orphanages

Being a single parent is a difficult challenge, especially when money is tight. If you’re a single parent in financial trouble, you may find this article helpful.

Governments around the world are becoming more aware of how important it is for household with single parents to have a stable source of income. They recognize that single parents have to make difficult choices and sacrifices to provide a safe home for their children.

Single parents, after all, have other options. Abortion is the first decision to make, and single parents have decided not to take this “easy way” out of their situation. They have not abandoned their children or offered them up for adoption. Whether we realize it or not, single parenting is a choice, and many single parents who make that choice are heroes.

Without enough financial resources, the life of a single parent can be difficult and dreary. Struggling from day to day to provide healthy meals is a battle. Providing appropriate clothing for growing children often forces acceptance of hand-me-downs and clothes cast off by more fortunate people. Health insurance may be out of the question, so free and low-cost clinics are the health care services they must choose.

If they don’t have a car, transportation depends on regular operation of sometimes undependable public mass transit systems. And even if they do have a car, regular maintenance costs and repairs may make using that car impossible. Keeping the children well-fed, warm, and healthy is a major task with many obstacles.

Yet, in spite of it all, they continue to trudge their path. They do what they can to meet the challenges and provide their children with as near a normal life as possible. Fortunately, there are places where single parents can go for financial help. This financial assistance may help relieve some of the stresses single parents face. Any help is welcomed help when your children are hungry.

While the federal government offers some limited help, local and state governments most often are the best hope for financial aid for single parents with children at home. Unfortunately, it is sometimes difficult to qualify, but careful research and persistence may pay off.

Where to Find Financial Help

The best places to start looking for financial assistance are your county and municipal governments. Family service departments, children’s agencies, and local unemployment services may offer financial assistance. Your state government may also have programs that will help. Start with the blue pages in your telephone book. Look for family services, health and welfare, employment/unemployment agencies, and children’s welfare departments and agencies. Make a lot of phone calls to find the offices that can help you.

This may be an intensely frustrating exercise, as you’ll get a lot of accidental hang-ups and be transferred more than you think possible. But hang in there. Keep talking to people, and eventually you’ll find that one dedicated public servant who really wants to help. Get their name and keep their phone number in case you need their help again. And thank them for their generosity. They may do it for a living, but the ones who will really work for you do it from the heart.

Once you’ve located the right office, you’ll have to fill out some forms. Be prepared to spend some time doing it. Patience and tolerance are the code words. You can’t gain anything by becoming angry or hostile. As much as it may chafe, be polite and gentle.

When you fill out all the necessary forms, be honest. Half-truths, omissions, and downright lies will only bring disappointment later on, and they may disqualify you from help from any agency in the jurisdiction.

You’ll probably have to prove your income level, jobs you have had or have now, your address, and the number and ages of your children. Be prepared to provide income tax statements, payroll stubs, mail documenting your address, and birth certificates for you and your kids. The more documentation you have in hand, the faster and smoother the process will go.

It’s important that you know the requirements and qualifications. Most financial aid agencies have minimum income requirements. If you more than that amount, you could may not qualify for help. There may be other requirements, too. You may have to qualify on the basis of rent you pay.

Look into the options available for your children. Even if you don’t qualify, your children might be eligible for assistance for school meal vouchers or other services.

How Do I Know If I’m Eligible for Financial Help?

Eligibility requirements will vary by state and by local government. You’ll have to do your homework to find out what’s required in your area. But if you’ve already located the right agencies, the work is almost done. The agency will have pamphlets and brochures that outline their requirements and qualifications.

Generally, there are basic requirements that all governments ask for. First, you must be single – divorced, widowed, or never married. You may not qualify if you are in a common law situation or living with someone without a marriage license.

If you are widowed, you and your children may already qualify for Social Security assistance. Contact your local Social Security Administration office for more information. Once again, prepare yourself for a long frustrating search. Try to find that one person who really cares. They are out there, and if you make enough phone calls, you’ll find them.

If you are handicapped or disabled, you may qualify for disability assistance. Health departments and employment offices may be able to point you in the right direction for help with health and disability issues.

Parents whose partner is in prison may qualify for financial aid whether or not they are legally married. If you can demonstrate that your spouse can not provide funds, you may be able to get financial assistance from your state, county, or community. This will depend on where you live. Contact your state and local law enforcement agencies to start your research. They may be able to help you ask the right questions.

Again, your children may qualify for financial assistance in their own rights. Look into programs that are geared toward health and welfare for children. But beware, you don’t want to get in a situation where the government questions your fitness as a parent. If you have ever had accusations or charges filed against your parenting, this may not be a good solution.

What If I Can’t Get Financial Help?

If your situation is dire and you still can’t get help, it may be time to make some very hard choices. Perhaps you have relatives who could provide living space for a while until you can have a more stable income. Maybe your relatives would be willing to take one or all of your children in for a while until you can get on your feet. As difficult as that decision might be, it’s better than giving your children up to a government institution.

See if local churches can help. They may be able to provide meals and clothing and some medical aid. Offer to do chores at the church in exchange for help.

If you are homeless, try local shelters. People will not let children suffer if there are any choices open to them.

Finally, if you can’t seem to find the help you need, you may need to consider seeking foster care for your children.

Whatever decisions you must make, make them in the best interest of your children. And God be with you in your journey.

When a woman becomes pregnant, one of the questions uppermost in the minds of the couple is whether they will be able to enjoy any sexual intercourse in the following months. Some couples dread pregnancies as it could put a dampener on their sexual life. But the good news is that pregnancy may not necessarily intervene in your sexual life at all. There are several misconceptions about having sexual intercourse during pregnancy and that is why couples develop wrong notions. However, most of these notions are quite unjustified.

The first thing one must understand is how pregnancy affects the body of the woman. Pregnancy occurs when the male sperm fertilizes the egg cell of the female. This fertilized egg is called as the embryo, which gets implanted in the uterus. Pregnancy brings about a host of changes in the woman, the first of them being the pause in the menstrual cycles. The embryo develops into the fetus. In order to protect the fetus, the amniotic cavity develops around it. The amniotic cavity is a fluid filled cavity meant for supplying the fetus with all the nutrients it requires for its development. At the same time, in order to prevent further fertilizations, the uterus opening, i.e. the cervix, is blocked off by a layer of mucus.

Now we know the changes that take place in the uterus when pregnancy occurs. Nature provides the growing fetus with all the protections necessary. The mucus layer cuts off the growing embryo from the rest of the outside world.

Contrary to popular belief, there is no harm in having sex when a woman is pregnant, and this could continue till late in the pregnancy. First and foremost, there is no way the penis or the seminal and vaginal fluids can come in contact with the embryo and cause any infections. This is because of the mucus layer that blocks off the cervix. Also for this very same reason, there can be no dislodging of the embryo inside the uterus in any manner.

However, care must be taken with the sexual positions that are adopted. The missionary position must be avoided, since in this position there is a tendency to lay more pressure on the uterus. The missionary position is the one in which the male lies on top and both partners are belly-to-belly in contact. Also the woman-on-top position must be avoided. Any other position in which pressure is not exerted on the woman’s uterus is acceptable.

It is necessary to speak to the doctor about sexual intercourse when the woman is pregnant. This is because though there are no technical problems with sexual intercourse during pregnancy, there can be some biological problems linked with the past of the woman. Like if the woman has had a premature birth in the past, then the doctor would advise the couple to refrain from penetrative sexual intercourse in the last three months of pregnancy. Women with miscarriages previously must not indulge in penetrative sexual intercourse during the first three months. And women who have a short cervix (this can be ascertained with a sonography test) must abstain from sexual intercourse throughout the pregnancy.

Yet sexual intercourse during pregnancy takes on a new meaning as the couple soon realizes. Since the woman’s body undergoes numerous changes – including the increase in the size of the breasts and the hips – the male partner may become more aroused. Hormonal changes may also induce the woman to become more libidinous during pregnancy. At the same time, on an emotional level, the partners develop greater love for each other in anticipation of their shared joy.

But the contrary of this case can also be seen. During pregnancy, some women might become too preoccupied with their thoughts to become interested in sexual intercourse. They may be intrigued by the changes in their bodies, and even scared of them to an extent. If such a situation arises, then it becomes the man’s responsibility to put the woman at ease.

Some couples could find sex during pregnancy too difficult to manage, due to the increase in the size of the couple. This could make the vagina difficult to access considering some sexual positions. The man may be reluctant to lie on top because of fear of harming the fetus, and the woman may not lie on top for fear of putting more weight on the man. Both of these situations could lead to difficulty in managing sexual intercourse.

Finally, it must be remembered that there are alternatives to sexual intercourse if things become too difficult. Mutual masturbation is one of the options. The couple can stimulate each other’s genitals by hands and lead them to orgasms. This could help relieve the sexual frustration. Oral sex can be performed without any problems. Though not advisable due to hygienic reasons, anal sex is also an option. But the most important thing is, the couple should develop stronger emotional bonds of love for each other. During pregnancy, it is best to make love with the mind than with the genitals.

There was a day when being a single parent earned public scorn. The assumption was that you must be immoral to have ended this way. But times have changed. The past decades have seen a dramatic increase in the number of single-parent households, and there’s no stigma attached to the status today.

Single parents who are facing financial hardships can find help today. Society is recognizing that “it takes a village to raise a child,” and governments are providing more financial assistance for families in financial distress.

And the help is not limited to white Americans. Black single parents face the same challenges and hardships as any other single parents, and government assistance programs are color-blind.

For example, black single parents in Arkansas can apply for a special scholarship program that helps them attend college. The attend school for free and receive a stipend every month to help meet expenses. The State of Arkansas believes that children will grow up to be better citizens if their parent is better educated. And Arkansas does not require both parents to be present to recognize a family. Single-parent families are as important in Arkansas as any family unit.

Black single parents who are unemployed can also get help from state and local governments to find a job. Employment offices will try to find work near the home for single parents who must also manage their household. In fact, they may offer financial assistance while the black single parent is job hunting.

To find sources of assistance in your state or community, check the blue section of your yellow pages. Look for family assistance, unemployment, and children’s welfare agencies and departments, and start calling. It may take some time to find that one person who really cares, but you will find help if you are patient and persistent.

Some local governments will advise both white and black single mothers to work from the home to give them more time to care for their children. The Internet offers opportunities to earn supplemental income from home. It’s not just a dating service! If you have the determination to learn and the patience to persist, you can earn a living from the Internet.

Online shopping services rake in millions, if not billions, of dollars every day. Selling their products through your own website can earn you commissions. There are also many opportunities to find work as a virtual secretary, writer, host for a forum, or a survey poller. And with a little help, you can sell your own products and services over the web. Having your name and number show up when someone queries for a local service is a great way to find additional work.

Trying to earn a living to support your family while also caring for your children is a stressful full-time job. As a single black parent, you may need to find some support to help you cope with daily stresses and the transition from one way of life to another.

Group therapy sessions are a great way to find a listening ear and emotional support when you are going through these struggles. The other group members are in the same situation, so they understand you and your problems. They can offer advice based on lessons they’ve learned while dealing with the same issues. Your local government may even sponsor such a group. Check out local services to see if that free service is available to you.

Support and therapy groups can help solve problems before they even come up. Group members know what you’re going through because they’ve been there. They may be able to help you build strong healthy relationships with your children. They may have solutions to household repair problems that you didn’t think of. If you don’t have a network of close friends to play that role, you may find a single parent group the perfect support system.

Black single parents need to take advantage of all the opportunities and services their state and local governments offer. It’s time to let go of that stubborn pride and admit you can’t do it all alone. Your children need a happy healthy parent, and you need to be there for them. If you don’t take advantage of the programs out there, you’ve cheated yourself and your family.

Daniel and Megan felt drawn to the little dark-haired child they had seen in the orphanage half way around the world, but they felt they had more questions than answers. “Where do we start?” Megan asked as we spoke on the phone. The adoption agency needed a response and they felt frozen in their fear. After receiving guidance and answers from other adoptive parents who had the same questions as Daniel and Megan, they soon brought home their little daughter. Megan shared later how the advice to seek a pediatrician early in the process helped them learn what to expect in their adoption and to have a realistic view of the challenges they might face. Now, six years later, they have adopted two more children, another girl and a boy from the same country.

When considering adoption, parents should always consult a pediatrician. Pediatricians with knowledge of the special needs of older children or international adoptions can be a wealth of information regarding issues that may arise with your adoptive child. They can provide vital information before the adoption, help with the decision making while in the process of adoption,
and assist with on-going issues after the adoption.

Discussing your plans to adopt with a pediatrician will give you much needed information about psychological and medical needs that your adoptive child may have. Your pediatrician can explain some medical problems common to newly adopted children. They may discuss issues of attachment, loss, and grief that adoptive children often go through. Your pediatrician may also discuss physical and medical issues that your adoptive child may be facing.

Meeting with your pediatrician before you start the adoption process will bring medical and mental health issues to light that you possibly were not aware of before. Such a meeting helped Megan and Daniel decide to adopt two more children. They gained knowledge and confidence, and their fear was minimized.

After starting the adoption process, a pediatrician can be an invaluable asset to you. If you are able, bring the medical and mental health records of the child to your pediatrician; they can explain specific issues to you. Often you will have a list of all the diagnoses that have been assigned to your child.

A pediatrician can explain them in terminology that you can understand and discuss possible long-term problems of particular disorders. For example, if a child has a diagnosis of Attention Deficit Disorder, your pediatrician can explain behaviors that are typical and problems other parents have had in dealing with their children. Your pediatrician will also model some language choices that you may not have thought of previously. For example, most pediatricians will refer to all the siblings in a family as brother or sister not ‘adopted brother’ or ‘adopted sister.’

Pediatricians are careful not to say ‘natural parent’ when speaking of the child’s birth parent. The term ‘natural parent’ implies that you are then the ‘unnatural parent.’ You must be comfortable talking openly with your pediatrician about all medical issues relating to the adoption of a new member into your family. If you do not already have a family pediatrician, ask other adoptive parents for recommendations and then interview several different pediatricians to find one that seems to best fit you and your family.

Some questions may be difficult for you to ask but will probably reveal the most important information to you. For instance, you may hear that a child you wanted to adopt is going to have a lot of medical issues that you don’t think you can handle. By discussing those issues openly, you will be able to prepare yourself fully for the adoption of your child. Or, after discussing the possible medical issues, you may decide not right for you. Do not be afraid to ask a lot of questions.

Your pediatrician’s job is to help you be the best parent you can be. Of course, your pediatrician will be of extreme help to you throughout your child’s life.

Pregnancy is an important stage for every woman bringing joy in the family but on the other hand, pregnancy involves many changes in women’s body and lifestyle. Even though being pregnant is not a disease, there are certain symptoms that indicate a possible pregnancy. Much more, pregnancy symptoms differ from woman to woman but most of them are the same in every case. In addition to this, signs of a possible pregnancy usually occur within a week of conception or several weeks or even cannot be present at all.

For instance, a first sign which may indicate the presence of pregnancy is the lack of menstrual cycle. Moreover some women may have a light bleeding or they can face another pregnancy symptom which usually appears in less than 2 weeks from conceptions and it is known as implantation bleeding. This symptom occurs when the embryo implants itself into the uterine wall, producing in this way bleeding and sometimes cramps.

Secondly, a common symptom of pregnancy which usually occurs or not between 2-8 weeks after conceptions is the morning sickness. Many women feel nausea at the beginning of their pregnancy and even during it and much more they may feel sick because of certain foods and odors. On the other hand, some women may feel the strong desire to eat certain dishes or even foods that used to hate before their pregnancy.

Some other signs which may show a possible pregnancy are some changes that affect the woman’s body. In addition to this some of these changes are the swollen or tender breasts, lower backaches, the sudden rise of hormones in the body that might cause headaches, swollen ankles and also weight gain. Pregnant women may notice some changes on their breasts, the skin around their nipples may get darker, a symptom which may have other explanations, such as hormonal imbalances or may be a leftover effect from previous pregnancies.

Thirdly, other sign which is related to pregnancy is the frequent urination. This sign may confirm the presence of a pregnancy only if it comes along with other signs of pregnancy. On the other hand, frequent urination may be caused by the urinary tract infection, diabetes or increasing liquid intake. What is more is that some pregnancy symptoms may be changes in women’s behaviour like feeling tired or sensitive, some things might made them angry or cry out of the blue.

To conclude, even though pregnancy is a normal thing which occurs to almost all women, it requires lots of attention and the change of lifestyle. Most of women can esily know if they are pregnant and can handle very well the pregnancy symptoms which sometimes may tend to be hard to carry on.

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